Give Thanks

Since tomorrow is Thanksgiving I thought I would take a few minutes to give thanks for some recent events in the sports world.

First off, there is twelve straight hours of football tomorrow.
God bless the Pilgrims.

Lets give thanks to Kansas St and Oregon for ensuring us of another SEC national title this year. Alabama doesn't blow second chances and according to Vegas the Tide would be a 14 point favorite over Notre Dame. That's assuming the Irish win on Saturday. A loss to USC would most likely mean two SEC teams playing in Miami.
As a fan of a team that plays in the SEC that's just what I wanna see. My team struggle while my rivals win titles. That's what troubles me about most "SEC" fans. If their team can't win it all they wanna see another conference foe on top.
Why? I have no idea. Other than stupidity I can't figure out why a fan would want another team in the conference to have an advantage in recruiting.
Guess what, the conference may look good with all these championships, but you don't.

Since we mentioned Oregon, give thanks to the Ducks cheerleaders.

We should definitely give thanks to NHL commissioner Gary Betman. The lockout is in full swing and after 10 straight days of negotiating he decided the best course of action would be too....take a vacation. That's right. The most incompetent commissioner in all of major sports (Rodger Goodell is a close second) thought it would be best to take a break. Its November, and we have no hockey Gary. You need to spend Thanksgiving with the players union, not in the Virgin Islands.

Give thanks to George St Pierre for his impressive return to the octagon last Saturday. Because of his win we may finally see a "super fight" with Anderson Silva.
Give thanks to Anderson Silva for being the baddest man on the planet.

And lastly let's give a special thanks to the best news of the year other than Tennessee's dismissal of Derek Dooley.

NASCAR.
It appears they crowned their champion this past Sunday and that means that activity is finally over. Who won? I have no idea. But I guarantee you it was a very un athletic guy, with a smoking hot wife ( which I will never understand) that spent half an hour thanking his sponsors and talking about how his - insert number here- car was fast all year long.
While I'm saying thanks tomorrow I'm gonna wish that NASCAR would hire Gary Betman to run things. The only thing better than their season being over would be a lockout.

So Happy Thanksgiving.

God bless food, football,cheerleaders and America.

And congrats to my brother Marcus. Or as her prefers to be called, "Mr All District"

Election Day

Head coaches are a lot like presidents right? I mean, they lie publicly, cheat privately, and take large amounts of money from donors to get what they want all the while trying to lead to victory.
So on this Election Day I decided to put together a small list of head coaches who should run for president.
Almost all of them would be a better fit in the White House than the two we have to choose from.

1. Nick Saban- For obvious reasons. First, the United States would dominate. Everything. The economy would turn, wars would last days, and gas would cost about $1.00 a gallon. Would you wanna be the Middle Eastern oil kings after Saban got done with you? No, you wouldn't. Because you would loose. And terrorist would issue apologies.

2. Bill Belichick- Again, domination would play a big part in electing Belichick. Most of the same things you get with Saban you get with Bill, and there wouldn't be any speculation as to who tailored his suits since he dresses like a homeless dude.

3. Chip Kelly- The United States would attack everything they did with speed and precision. Giving his tempo, he could repair the economy, erase the national debt, and fix healthcare in about six months. He would spend the second half of the term thinking about his next term.

4. Bobby Petrino- He might get impeached by year two but I think he would be very Clinton like. Especially with the interns.

5. Brian Kelly- If we don't get him, Ireland will. He would run a tight but steady ship and Catholics everywhere would rejoice. America would be fine, unless we ran into actually competition.

Vice Presidential Candidates:

1. Derek Dooley- Never has made it as the Big Man but has always been good in a supporting role. Looks the part of a politician and would use useless bits of American history in his speeches.

2. Bill Snyder- He would bring respect and dignity to the White House. Pair him with the right President and our government would run flawlessly.

3. Mike Leech- Not the best guy to lead, but would be a hell of a right hand man. Could put together an explosive economic game plan, and press conferences and debates would be epic.

Left Of the Ballot:

Steve Spurrier- To brash to lead the nation and The Ole Ball Coach doesn't play second fiddle to anybody. Couldn't you see Spurrier interrupting the Speaker of the House with that sarcastic who do you think you are tone?

Jimmy Johnson- Although he's a proven winner, you can't have a leader with erectile dysfunction. At least not publicly known. Would he run Cialis commercials in between campaign adds?

Bill Cower- Yes he's a winner, but he also looks like he hates everyone. All the time. And I think he actually does. He may be the type of guy to bomb the entire world just because he's having a bad day.

Of course these are just a few candidates that could help our country.

And who knows what will happen tonight.

Nick Saban already has several write in votes in the state of Alabama.